I’ve been thinking about the aforementioned comparing/competing cycle that we humans seem to be caught up in, and am noticing how we spend the great majority of our time proving our worth in order to get kudos from others. It’s like we spend all our time trying to suck praise and admiration out of others, and we’re all doing it!
Listen to the conversations that happen around you, listen to the words, the pronouns, and note how many times you here “I” and “they” and “them” and “you” and “we”, and then note how many of these words are followed by the word “did…” or “said…” or “think…” It’s like we need to get our quota of reassurance each day.
I’ve also noticed that there’s a distinct difference between those who have a better handle on how loved they are, and those who don’t. The biggest indicators are:
- they aren’t constantly looking for someone to blame
- they readily acknowledge their faults
- they are genuinely humble
- they apologise quickly
- they rarely tear others down, but rather recognise their brokeness and have compassion for them
- they don’t need to be constantly reassured
- they’re low maintenance friends
- and possibly most importantly, they can freely give love away, recognising that it doesn’t cost them anything
Sounds wonderful doesn’t it? This is who I want to become, with Dad’s help… and love.